The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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