I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
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