I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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