census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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