walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize