didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
