yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
She has the best kind of daddy issues
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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