and she was petting her beer can
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
