Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
