Whod you bang
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Drunk is not a location!
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