whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
