youre lurking in front of me
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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