Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
