eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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