That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I did not marry a roomba.
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