this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize