theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
