the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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