He is an equal opportunity slut.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize