I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
So much rum. So many feels.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
