I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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