Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
it was like eating out sand paper
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
