Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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