Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize