OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
