sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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