I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
