No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Bring me that man meat
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
