You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I love you. Go after that dick
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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