I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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