i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
