i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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