My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
