I wannas sexs uuuuu
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
