just come out here and I will go home with you...
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
