I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
