If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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