Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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