"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
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