Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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