What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Randomize
