Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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