We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
