spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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