:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
