I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
