i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
