I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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