i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
