This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
